I think he has a very high opinion of his abilities (which is justified!) and therefore can be extremely critical of his own performance, and judge himself to have failed in his duties to others when nobody else thinks he did.
This is actually a really valid interpretation! But as for the "failed," bit... We don't actually see many instances of him thinking he's failed, unless it's actually (vaguely) justified, imo. Like him thinking, "Hell I should have killed Ye Zun back when I had the chance," which is exactly what I would have thought, too, given the circumstances. Or even "I led Dixingren soldiers against Dixing and now most of them are dead, I gotta step up to plate next time, even if it puts my life at risk," which, again, is something I would have thought in that situation.
Or maybe this whole post was brought about by my own tendency to take on too much responsibility, but not be particularly prone to guilt (first-born child in a rather conservative South Asian family, what can you do?), lol.
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This is actually a really valid interpretation! But as for the "failed," bit... We don't actually see many instances of him thinking he's failed, unless it's actually (vaguely) justified, imo. Like him thinking, "Hell I should have killed Ye Zun back when I had the chance," which is exactly what I would have thought, too, given the circumstances. Or even "I led Dixingren soldiers against Dixing and now most of them are dead, I gotta step up to plate next time, even if it puts my life at risk," which, again, is something I would have thought in that situation.
Or maybe this whole post was brought about by my own tendency to take on too much responsibility, but not be particularly prone to guilt (first-born child in a rather conservative South Asian family, what can you do?), lol.